I love attending author readings. I didn't start going until my adult life, though. I was required to attend a poetry reading for my poetry class a year or so ago, but then I started attending them whenever I could because they were fun! They give me a "vision" of what it might be like when I (someday) become a debut author. Also, there's often Q & A at the end, and I've learned a lot about the writing and publishing process just from hearing those answers and sometimes asking my own questions.
Then, while drafting, she refers to these notebooks that (hopefully) has answers to her questions while she's drafting. If they don't, then she will give herself a note in the draft to look it up later. Later, she'll dive into the researching rabbit hole and record her answers.
But, as she admitted, she's still refining her process and it's difficult to keep organized.
Walking among giants
Attending this event felt a little different than others. I felt the difference when I first walked in. I showed up, and everyone was hugging and talking and taking pictures. Maybe I had never been this early before, though, so I didn't think much of it.
After Amy Loveblood's reading, I stood in line to get my book signed. The bookstore host went around and wrote our names on post-its so we could have them personalized if we wanted. The gal behind me didn't have to tell her name to the bookstore clerk, though. "Oh, it was funny talking to your publisher," the clerk said as she wrote her name. "She wanted to know if I could book you in for a reading, but I had you scheduled months ago. I saw you had a book coming out, so I just put you in." They hugged and laughed. Wow, I thought. What would that be like?...
Before I could really imagine having that kind of relationship with one of my all time favorite bookstores, I overheard the clerk talk to the next person in line. She asked for her name, wrote it down, and then looked at her. "You colored your hair," she said. "When's your next book coming out?" Wow, I thought again. I'm walking among giants here. These people are living my dream. I was sandwiched between published authors. Wow! Wow! Wow! I almost expected someone to ask me when my book was coming out and blushed as I thought about my unfinished discovery draft at home. Thankfully, no one asked me.
When it was my turn to get my book signed, I handed her the book and Amy Loveblood looked at my name, then at me. She asked if my last name was Lamoreaux. She said it wrong, but that's not her fault. It's Hubby's fault for having a complicated French name. ha ha! She remembered meeting me on Twitter, probably from the #MTMC thing, though. I told her, yes and something else I don't remember, which made me blush, but smiley at the same time. I quickly got out of line and hid behind a piece of cake... still smiling. This is awesome...
As I was driving home, I practically giggled out loud. I had had such a good time at the reading. I learned about the writing and researching process, I got to hear the author read a part of her incredible book (that I can't wait to start reading!), I was among other published authors, and I got cake.
I envisioned myself holding a copy of my work-in-progess, all shiny and published. People waited in line to have me their copy, and I saw myself answering questions, talking about my passion for writing and then reading out loud a bit of my book at Changing Hands.
When I got home, I pulled my keys out of the ignition and I remembered, Oh, yeah. My book isn't finished. I still haven't completed the discovery draft I started a year ago! I haven't revised, edited or had beta readers. I haven't even gotten close to querying. As I walked into our apartment, I felt like I picked up a bag of rocks. The weight of my goal suddenly felt heavy.
I told Hubby about the experience, shared some cake and laughed about Amy Loveblood knowing me from the Internet. I opened my copy of Nothing But Sky to show him my personalized message and realized I hadn't even looked at it myself!
"Dream big," she told me. I giggled and got back to work on my project.
It hurts, you know?
It's natural for me to get defensive about my work, which I did last summer with this author who was just trying to help. I didn't yell or anything. But I didn't take her advice very well. Hubby actually had a lot more names for him/her, oddly enough. ha ha! But I ended up dumping the project (for the second time) and starting something new, which was okay, I guess.
More recently, a few weeks ago, I met with another trustworthy reviewer that gave me hard criticism about my writing, and guess what? I took notes. I nodded. I said thank you, and then I quietly cried in the bathroom before I drove home. It hurts. You know? I put so much into this new project, this new draft, and all I she told me was what was NOT working in my writing.
Teaching peer review hasn't helped
I think part of my problem is that I teach how to give appropriate feedback to writing... as an ESL teacher... and as a tutoring center coordinator. I'm a HUGE believer in the writing process. I believe that writing has the right to grow and adapt as you brainstorm throughout the drafting process.
I didn't have a completed discovery draft in either of the cases I shared above. They called it a first draft, but Bill Konigsberg told me a couple years ago that even if you rewrite the first chapter over and over, you don't have a first draft until you have a draft for every chapter in the book. And Marylee McDonald told me that discovery drafts are those drafts before you get to the end of the book, and they're essential to the process because it's how your characters tell you the story for the first time.
I'm also a believer in pacing feedback. When I give suggestions for improvement to my ESL students (or anyone I tutor), I recognize their goals (assignment deadlines, usually) and decide appropriate suggestions that they can work on now without making them feel overwhelmed.
I sometimes forget that that's not the way it works in the creative writing world, although I think it should. The reviewer I worked with a couple weeks ago treated my discovery draft like a completed manuscript that needed editing, even though I tried to explain my expectations of our session. I wanted to brainstorm, to talk about plot and possible solutions for problems that my characters were facing. (She told me to fix my syntax.)
Tell me what works!
I'm not far into my creative writing certificate, but so far-- I've been taught that it is just as important to show the writer what is working well in the story as well as what might help it improve.
One of my instructors shared this super helpful link with us before we started reviewing each other's work. I use this as a guideline, and I wish all peer reviewers worked like this.
Getting used to "no"
Last summer, when I got slapped in the face, Hubby said, "well, consider this your first rejection letter." I know that it wasn't exactly true, but he was reminding me of Stephen King. He said that he had an entire wall full of rejection letters. It's part of the publishing world, and I don't think things have changed that much since he first started querying.
This last weekend, I attended the WriteOnCon, and for one of the keynotes, they talked about the importance of no. It's part of the writer's life. I probably won't do it justice, but the speaker was basically saying that we get rejection letters before we get an agent or contract. We get poor reviews. Heck, she said that she had a book signing, and only two people bought her book. Rejection, unfortunately, is part of the writer's life. You can't make everyone happy, you know?
Why do we write?
So, if we get slapped in the face and get rejected, why do we do it? I can't speak for everyone, but I don't give up because I love reading. And because it's fun. I like playing with words. I love creating. I love that moment where I'm able to convey some awesome image or feeling to another reader. I believe I have a story to tell, and I'm the only one who can tell it the way I can.
So, I'm in a researching mood.
I don't know what's right or wrong (or if there's a right or wrong in writing a book) but I have a hard time doing all my research for a project all up front. I suspect you're supposed to do all your researching before you start writing a story or book. But I always think of questions as I'm writing or discover characters that need backstories, etc. So... for me, researching is an ongoing thing. I have tons of pictures on Pintrest and screenshots of googlemaps, etc. I've watched lengthy documentaries on king cobra snakes and King Arthur, anything that helps me with my writing, right? I may or may not use the research I collect, but it's there, just in case. Like backstory and exposition. I only use it if it becomes necessary.
NaNoWriMo taught me to not let research get in the way of drafting. It can defiantly lead you down a rabbit hole, and then it's hard to get back into writing the story. Despite this advice, though, I still find myself googling random facts sometimes. (That's okay, right?) And I find myself taking breaks from drafting to do a bit of researching. Sometimes it it helps me with writer's block. Give me ideas.
Well, I'm really excited about researching right now because the trip Hubby and I have planned for next month will be really close to where the bulk of my story takes place! It wasn't hard to talk him into visiting the streets where my characters walk and talk. He's invested in my story, enough. Plus, I promise to take him to a good restaurant afterwards.
The guy I called was super cheerful, especially after I told him we had reservations with their hotel already, and he helped answer some questions I had about our trip. He even shared his opinion, as a local of the area.
After I got off the phone, I decided to do a bit of writing. I'm at 29,000 words of my current discovery draft. I'm trying to finish it before New Year's. (Wish me luck!) Anyway, I had a question about one of my character's occupation. The dad in my story is a librarian, and I wondered about the responsibilities of a librarian and if their schedules vary from day to day. I thought about going to my local library (which I probably will do) and ask for an interview. Tom Leveen taught me once that you should never be ashamed to tell someone you're writing a book, especially if it helps you score an interview for research.
But I had had such a good experience calling the hotel we were staying at that I looked up the library that my character probably works at and asked if the librarian would let me ask her some questions about her job in order to help me with my story. I think I asked it badly because she transferred me to the reference desk. ha ha! Maybe she thought I needed a reference guide for writing a book or something. It worked out, though, because this second librarian worked in the children's section of the library, so I could ask a lot more questions to her than I could have to a different librarian. You see, my character is in charge of "Toddler Time," or story time for kids, which this librarian did.
I won't bore you with the details of conducting my first phone call interview as a writer, but I will tell you that you should do it! I had a list of general questions I wanted to ask. I had skimmed their website and calendar page, but she referenced me to BLS.gov/ooh to learn about librarian pay in the United States and pointed me to their website for more information. So, if I were you, I'd plan to find your own answers on the website before asking them.
Nevertheless, the librarian I talked to, Rita, was super nice. And she gave me insight to her library that I don't think I would have gotten at my local library. Plus--- at the end of our conversation, she said that when (not if) I get published, that I should let her know, and she'd be happy to help promote it. Wow! I love that my character is a librarian!
I'm currently taking an online creative writing class at the community college I work for. It's called "Structuring the Novel." Along with lots of workshopping, we've completed a few writing exercises. This last week, we watch the short video below.
Anyway, I'm not quite half way through my first draft yet, and I've been struggling with my story structure for a while now. I'm hoping to complete it this month with NaNoWriMo, but as a part-time panster, I've been having a hard time getting words on the page.
I admit right now that I spent far too much time on this assignment. After I plotted the ups and downs that I've already written, and then the ups and downs for what I want to happen, I wrote bullet points, explaining the progression of the story. As I did this, it solidified what I had in my head (and in my messy notebooks). It also helped me come up with some other ideas, too. And then I got more ideas as I shared my chart with my husband. I think the more ways we think about or explain our stories, the more real they become.
I discovered this phenomenon just a couple months ago. Actually, it was during July's CampNaNoWriMo. See, for camp, you get to set your own word count or (new this last year) page count. I had a hard time deciding how many words I wanted to set. They probably shouldn't let you, but during camp, you can change your goal as many times as you want, up to a specific date, which I think is just a couple weeks before the month ends.
If the book is really good, I'll say, "just one more chapter!" and then another until my eyes won't stay open. How many of us do that?! (Look around and see the raised hands around the world.)
So why wouldn't my writing be the same?
Now I sit up at night, writing/ revising my book with this kind of attitude--- just one more chapter, just one more chapter... It's often said differently than when I'm reading because reading is always so much easier than writing. When I'm reading, I'm looking at the clock, justifying that reading one more chapter will be okay before bed, before work, before doing chores. ha ha!
With my writing, I'm pushing myself. One more chapter, one more chapter... I think I can... I think I can..
Today I simply want everyone (anyone) who reads my blog posts to watch Liz Gilbert talk about the elusive creative genius. The video is provided below. Then, if you like it or don't like it, you can read my thoughts about it below. And if you agree or disagree with my thoughts or what Liz Gilbert says, than we can start a conversation, either in this blog thread or on twitter, which is where I do the majority of my social media interactions.
I am a writer
All my life, I've wanted to be a writer. But I couldn't just say, even as a kid, I want to be a writer. I had to come up with other things that I wanted to be: a teacher, an astronaut, a farmer. Like Liz, I had people asking me if I was afraid to be a writer. Could I support myself? What if I don't get published? What if your books aren't successful? Why would you choose to be a starving artist?
As a kid, I wasn't so much, but as I got older and actually started writing and/or learning about the adult world, I got scared. Those questions made more and more sense to me, and I fell into the "what-if" syndrome.
Now that I'm much older and (maybe) a bit more wiser and have an established career as an ESL teacher, as a source of income to sustain me in my writing and pick me up should I fail, am I still afraid? Yes. Of course I am.
Protective Psychological Construct
Liz talks about how her success is probably behind her, and she has had to find a way to help her psychologically trick herself into not giving up--- because she wants to keep doing what she loves doing. For me, my future is ahead of me. I'm still young, but I almost feel like I've waited too long to start in on this life-long dream of becoming a published author. Why wasn't I writing more "shitty" drafts (to use Anne Lemott's words) or why wasn't I taking creative writing classes while I was studying for my MTESOL? The same can be said about my drumming, which I finally got serious about doing a few years ago, and not in high school.
It could be natural for me to stop while I'm ahead. Writing is hard. Being a creative genius (to use Liz's words) is intimidating and daunting. So why do I write?
I love language. I love words. I love stories. I was talking to a friend today, and she said, "Kassie, your love for reading is contagious. It makes me want to read more." She also said she can see my passion for stories, for writing. It's in my blood. It's in my soul. I want to be a writer, as scary as that may be.
My motivations for writing come from my reading, from my past (small) successes in writing. I believe with practice, with grit (another great video), I will get there. Eventually.
Catching the Poem
Can I just say how much I love that part in Liz's talk about catching the poem, like a "barreling train of air." I don't know if I've experienced that in as much degree as she describes, and I haven't ever caught a poem backwards before, but I've had ah-ha moments. I live for those.
More often than not, my process is more like the artist she talks about, who is driving. He needs to tell the inspiration to come back when it's a more opportune moment. I've had those. Most the time when that happens, I beg it to stay until I am able to write it down, and sometimes I can.
Continue to Show-Up: Do your Job!
Liz's passion for showing up to do the job is something I try to do every day. Recently, I've set aside at least two hours of writing a day. With school starting up, it's been tricky to keep to that schedule (like my drum phone calls). And sometimes, even during that one or two hours I'm sitting there, I don't always get the best out of me. And that's okay. At least I'm showing up. At least I'm doing my "job."
This video is somewhat old, but the content, I think is very poignant, so I hope you enjoyed it, too, and we can remember why we write, why we dream, why we do creative things.
This summer has been great for reading! Like I wrote last year, I believe reading is an essential part of becoming a successful writer. And of course summer, isn't the only time I read. Heavens no! But I find that I get the most reading in during the summer when I'm not teaching and going to school, etc., so I feel that it's a good idea to report and/or share my reading successes in the summer.
It's been especially rewarding this year as I've participated (for the first time!) in our library's summer challenge. If you read 1,000 minutes, you earn a free book. I used to think it was just for the kiddos, but then I asked, and the librarian told me adults can participate it in, too. So I did. And I got a free burrito from Cafe Rio when I hit my 500 minutes and, of course, that free book at 1,000 minutes.
I believe it's good to read a variety of things, as Stephen King taught me, but I also believe it's important to read what you want. I mean, yes--- I earned a degree in English Literature. I actually like Crime and Punishment, A Farewell to Arms and Animal Farm, which are the kinds of books you probably expect someone like me to read all the time.
But at the same time, it's better to read something than nothing at all because you're embarrassed about showing others what you're reading. It's like I've been trying to keep face, to make everyone believe or see that I only choose books that are intellectual, adult, and/or portrayed as classic literature. About a year or so ago, I finally decided that's rubbish. Who cares? I'm going to read what I want, and who cares who sees me doing it!
So I've been reading a lot of young adult, which, actually, a lot of adults pick up these days anyway.
I've tried have a variety this summer, but not as much as I should, but hey! I was reading. And I totally went over the 1,000 minutes of reading. Easy!
Here's the list:
Within those two types, there are categories. For example, in traditional publishing, there's the Big Five, Mid-size and Large, and Small Presses. In Self-Publishing, there's Hybrid, Assisted, and DIY. Marylee gave us an awesome grid that shows the pros and cons for each type of "delivery" or publishing. (If I get a PDF of it, I'll put it at the bottom of this blog.)
This was a lot of help to me as I try to decide what my goals are as a writer.
Don't be surprised by the request to build an author's platform
This means you need to have ready to go:
Marylee admits that this can be discouraging to many writers, especially those not computer savvy. However, it's easier than you may think. There are lots of resources to help you get started. Personally, as an extrovert, this sounds like a lot of fun. Nevertheless, it is a hard truth, and it's even harder if you're self-publishing because you're basically managing everything.
Just get started, Marylee says, and take baby-steps.
Timing is everything
Marylee gave us a list of keys to success. She said that you need to:
She gave us a list of things to do prior to book launch. It's defiantly a list I'll keep and use when I'm ready.
Write and memorize your pitch
Even if you self-publish, you'll be asked to talk about your book. You need to be ready to tell people what your book is about. The pitch, the synopsis and query are just as important as the manuscript.
TRUTH FROM YOURS TRUELY
Like I said in part 1 of this blog post, I learned a lot from Marylee MacDonald. It isn't over, yet. I'm actually meeting with her one-on-one on Friday and, hopefully, in August as well. I'm sure she'll have more workshops in August as well.
I remember her inviting me to go to her first publishing-themed workshops. I told her "I'm not there, yet," but she told me I should come anyway. I'm glad I did. I've learned a lot.
Of course, it's probably one of those things that you learn best on-the-job, like riding a bike. People can tell you all about riding a bike, but until you do it yourself, you won't know what it's like to to do it.
I've taken notes. I've mused about them in a two-part blog. I'll learn more after I "finish" my manuscript and start working towards publication.
But it's exciting! I hope you've enjoyed skimming through what I've learned (so far!) this summer from Marylee MacDonald.
My library invites published authors to hold office hours in the library and help aspiring authors.
They give workshops (to all the branches) and appointment-based one-on-one feedback for writers. For the past year, since I learned about the program, I've made a point to meet with each and/or participate in one or more of their workshops. I've met Bill Konigsberg, Tom Leveen, Shonna Slayton, and Melissa Marr. From June-August, the writer in residence has been Marylee MacDonald.
I feel like in all of her workshops, she ends up talking a bit about publishing. (She gave two workshops, actually, specifically about publishing.) I'm grateful because it's such a fickle and mysterious world to many writers, including me.
She provides resources for aspiring authors on her website and answers questions about publishing because, as she says, "I just wants to share what I've learned." It's hard to sum-up everything she's taught me over the past couple months, but I'm going to try anyway. Enjoy the musings!
The hard truth about publishing
She has a funny list about why-you-won't-be-published, which she's shown in at least two of her workshops. I don't have her full list, but it has stuff like:
Right now, she says the thing that sells are romance novels and YA literature. There are lots of genres out there within these categories, like vampire romance novels (yes, that is such a thing), and it's important to know what you wrote and if it will sell. Because sometimes it doesn't.
Marylee is an advocate for senior-citizen writers (and is one herself), but another "hard truth" she taught about the publishing world is that agents don't like signing on writers who are in their 60s or older. Why? Maryless says it's because they don't know how many books they can get out of you. It's a business. They don't want one book from their authors. They want a lot.
It's not fair, but that's the hard truth. Another hard truth, which does affect me (I'm in my 30's) is that it takes a LONG time to publish. Sometimes 10 or more years. The sooner you start, the better, I guess.
The publishing industry is like a fish market
This analogy is a good one. It fits with what I learned in the book 78 Reasons Why Your Book May Never Be Published and 14 Reasons Why it Might by Pat Walsh, a book a highly recommend, by the way.
Basically, everyone goes for the freshest fish. You need to not only be young, but also have a fresh idea. Your book needs to be original and good. Really good.
You're book's not done until you feel like throwing up
Marylee said, "If you think you're done, you're not." After you write all those words--- beginning, middle and end--- you need to proof read it. And then proof read it again. She says that if you have 20 avid readers (not friends or family) read your book and they say, "I couldn't put it down," then you're getting closer to finishing, but you're not, yet. She says you'll be so sick of the book that you'll feel like throwing up.
That's when it's "done."
Read Part 2 of this blog
Recently, I wrote about my commitment to studying and learning about plot structure. In addition, I've been thinking a lot about character motivation.
In this blog, I learned some simple ways to begin studying plot and characters. One of the suggestions is to watch movies and read books, looking for something in the story, whether it be the inciting event, the climax, or something else. You're supposed to look for one or two things. Along with using post-its for the books I read, marking the important bench marks in the story, I've been asking questions about motivation.
I think it's been driving hubby crazy. For example, the other day we went to his parents house and watched It Takes Two. You know, the Mary Kay and Ashley Olsen flick, back when they were young and innocent. I hadn't seen it in years! I kept asking questions like: Why does the evil fiancé want to have the wedding in one day? She's waited this long to court the billionaire, why is a month so long for her now?
Together, he and decided that the evil fiancé saw Roger with Dianne and knew that it was true love, too! She was scared that she'd get dumped for true love.
Then, when she told one of the Olsen twins, "I know exactly what you're trying to do! My father remarried three times, and each time I tried to get rid of my stepmother. I wanted my Dad's attention, too..." I wondered--- then why are you so mean to her? If you were in the same situation, why are you doing this?
Questions like these, I think, are good. Sometimes I can figure out answers, but sometimes I can't, and that's okay.
The best thing about doing this is that I've started questioning motivation in my own characters.
"There's nothing to writing. All you do is sit down... and bleed."
"Mongkonk Street, Hong Kong"